Derailed and Re-railed

Photo by Fabrizio Verrecchia from Pexels

Hi! It’s been a minute.

I’m not incredibly sure where I’m going with this post — I just know I need to get back to writing. Recently, someone told me a story about how something I said influenced a decision they made for Jesus — and holy cow how humbling that is, in addition to being a pretty good kick in the pants. Don’t get me wrong, I have no illusions of grandeur or notoriety. But I have definitely abandoned this blog, and the blog had been an important part of spiritual discipline (reading God’s word daily and reflecting on it). Incidentally, others have been blessed by that and I am extremely thankful for the way God has decided to use my faithfulness — when I’ve been faithful.

But as with most derailments, the derailment from writing did not start out lacking a legitimate reason: right before Thanksgiving, I suffered a miscarriage. How God carried me through this — and is still carrying me — is a topic unto itself, but I’m not sure I’m prepared to write about it just yet.

The miscarriage knocked me out of every rhythm I had established. My Bible reading got a bit sporadic for a while and other spiritual disciplines I had built over the last few years all crumbled in the face of grief. Not a great assessment of my spiritual condition, for sure. However, reflecting upon how easily I got knocked off the bandwagon, as it were, I’m really thankful that God was showing me how weak I am to be faithful. He is always showing us that we cannot. But He can.

But with a good hoist from the Lord Almighty, I clambered back onto this bandwagon and started reading my Bible daily again. And finally — FINALLY — I finished my first cover-to-cover read. I have started all over again, and am following a chronological plan this time. I’m currently in Exodus (and, btw, if you don’t have an Archaeology Study Bible, get yourself one immediately because the Old Testament is a much more beautiful, wonderful, profound story with all of the cultural and historical notes. Holy Moly).

In the midst of this, of course, IT came. Coronavirus. Or COVID, or whatever you want to call it (I have OPINIONS! but I’ll spare you). Suddenly we were doing Bible study from home, church from home, my husband was working from home (honestly, I didn’t mind that!), I was grocery shopping online — everything. You would think that all of this time at home would have afforded me more time to blog, but, weirdly it did not. In addition to these unforeseen circumstances, our dishwasher broke, our refrigerator broke, our septic system started showing its age, my husband returned to his office in Minneapolis the week the race riots broke out, and basically all heck seems to have broken loose everywhere.

Oh, and we’re expecting our first baby boy in October.

It has been a YEAR, y’all.

But in this YEAR OF YEARS, God has been very faithful. I know as things continue to get complicated (I hear having three kids is a little more of a circus than having two), I know He will be still. So I hope to be back in the rhythm of reflecting on these things weekly. Thanks for bearing with me!

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